PART 3
\n\u201cCould there be two?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cThere could,\u201d she said carefully. \u201cBut not with the same Social Security information on the filing.\u201d<\/p>\n
I stared at her.<\/p>\n
\u201cYou checked?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cI did.\u201d<\/p>\n
She lowered her voice.<\/p>\n
\u201cI knew something wasn\u2019t right when you came back yesterday.\u201d<\/p>\n
I looked down at the certificate again.<\/p>\n
The date was three years ago.<\/p>\n
Three years.<\/p>\n
Not last month.<\/p>\n
Not last year.<\/p>\n
Three years.<\/p>\n
I thought about all the Tuesdays.<\/p>\n
All those Tuesday nights when Jeremy had driven to Nashville.<\/p>\n
All the times I had stood at the kitchen window watching his truck disappear down our road.<\/p>\n
All the times he had come home tired, kissed my forehead, and said, \u201cLong day, Jill-girl.\u201d<\/p>\n
Three years.<\/p>\n
I had been making his pork chops while my husband was apparently married to another woman.<\/p>\n
I looked at Bonnie.<\/p>\n
\u201cDoes this mean my marriage isn\u2019t legal anymore?\u201d<\/p>\n
Bonnie\u2019s expression changed.<\/p>\n
\u201cNo, honey.\u201d<\/p>\n
She paused.<\/p>\n
\u201cThis doesn\u2019t tell us that.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cThen what does it tell us?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cIt tells us that your husband entered into another marriage three years ago.\u201d<\/p>\n
The word another hit me harder than I expected.<\/p>\n
Another.<\/p>\n
Not second.<\/p>\n
Not mistake.<\/p>\n
Another.<\/p>\n
I put the certificate back into the envelope.<\/p>\n
My hands were shaking now.<\/p>\n
Bonnie pushed a tissue box toward me.<\/p>\n
I almost laughed.<\/p>\n
\u201cI\u2019m not crying.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cI know.\u201d<\/p>\n
She said it gently.<\/p>\n
\u201cSometimes the crying comes later.\u201d<\/p>\n
I took the envelope.<\/p>\n
\u201cHow much do I owe you?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cYou already paid.\u201d<\/p>\n
I nodded.<\/p>\n
Then I turned to leave.<\/p>\n
I made it six steps before Bonnie called after me.<\/p>\n
\u201cMrs. Tolley?\u201d<\/p>\n
I stopped.<\/p>\n
She came around the counter.<\/p>\n
\u201cThere\u2019s something else.\u201d<\/p>\n
I turned.<\/p>\n
She looked uncomfortable.<\/p>\n
\u201cThere was an amended filing attached to the record.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cWhat kind of amendment?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cI can\u2019t tell you everything without pulling the supporting document.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cCan you pull it?\u201d<\/p>\n
She hesitated.<\/p>\n
\u201cI can.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cPlease.\u201d<\/p>\n
Bonnie returned to her desk.<\/p>\n
I stood there waiting.<\/p>\n
A minute later, she came back holding another sheet.<\/p>\n
She handed it to me.<\/p>\n
The document was dated six months after the marriage.<\/p>\n
It wasn\u2019t a divorce.<\/p>\n
It wasn\u2019t an annulment.<\/p>\n
It was a name change request.<\/p>\n
The bride\u2019s name had been changed.<\/p>\n
From Lacey Burcham\u2026<\/p>\n
to Lacey Tolley.<\/p>\n
My stomach dropped.<\/p>\n
She had actually taken his name.<\/p>\n
I stared at the page until the letters blurred.<\/p>\n
Then I noticed something else.<\/p>\n
An address.<\/p>\n
Nashville.<\/p>\n
A medical facility.<\/p>\n
The same facility printed on the parking stub I had found in Jeremy\u2019s truck.<\/p>\n
Vanderbilt.<\/p>\n
I looked at Bonnie.<\/p>\n
\u201cWhy would this be attached to a marriage license?\u201d<\/p>\n
Bonnie shook her head.<\/p>\n
\u201cI don\u2019t know.\u201d<\/p>\n
I folded the paper.<\/p>\n
\u201cThank you.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cJill.\u201d<\/p>\n
I looked up.<\/p>\n
She had stopped calling me Mrs. Tolley.<\/p>\n
She looked at me like a woman instead of a customer.<\/p>\n
\u201cDon\u2019t confront him until you know what you\u2019re dealing with.\u201d<\/p>\n
I almost told her I didn\u2019t need advice.<\/p>\n
But I did.<\/p>\n
So I nodded.<\/p>\n
\u201cOkay.\u201d<\/p>\n
I walked out.<\/p>\n
This time, I didn\u2019t sit in the car immediately.<\/p>\n
I stood beside it and looked at the courthouse.<\/p>\n
Same building.<\/p>\n
Same brick.<\/p>\n
Same flag.<\/p>\n
Same parking lot.<\/p>\n
A place where people went to get married, get divorced, file paperwork, pay fines, record deeds.<\/p>\n
And somehow, for twenty-two years, I had believed the most important thing my husband had ever signed was our marriage license.<\/p>\n
Now I knew better.<\/p>\n
I got into the car.<\/p>\n
I didn\u2019t call Jeremy.<\/p>\n
I didn\u2019t text him.<\/p>\n
I didn\u2019t call Lacey.<\/p>\n
Instead, I drove to Nashville.<\/p>\n
I had no plan.<\/p>\n
I just knew I had to see the address.<\/p>\n
The drive took nearly an hour.<\/p>\n
The whole way, my mind kept inventing explanations.<\/p>\n
Maybe someone had stolen his identity.<\/p>\n
Maybe someone had forged his signature.<\/p>\n
Maybe there was another Jeremy Lee Tolley.<\/p>\n
Maybe Lacey was sick.<\/p>\n
Maybe he had helped her with something.<\/p>\n
Maybe\u2014<\/p>\n
No.<\/p>\n
I stopped myself.<\/p>\n
There was always a point where explanations became excuses.<\/p>\n
I had spent three years making excuses for Tuesday nights.<\/p>\n
I wasn\u2019t going to make another one.<\/p>\n
When I reached Vanderbilt, I parked in the visitor garage.<\/p>\n
I walked through the hospital doors.<\/p>\n
People moved around me carrying coffee, flowers, backpacks, paperwork.<\/p>\n
A child slept against his mother\u2019s shoulder.<\/p>\n
An old man sat in a wheelchair beside a window.<\/p>\n
A nurse hurried past me.<\/p>\n
Everything was painfully normal.<\/p>\n
I went to the information desk.<\/p>\n
\u201cI\u2019m looking for a patient,\u201d I said.<\/p>\n
The woman looked up.<\/p>\n
\u201cName?\u201d<\/p>\n
I hesitated.<\/p>\n
\u201cLacey Burcham.\u201d<\/p>\n
She typed.<\/p>\n
Then stopped.<\/p>\n
\u201cLacey Tolley?\u201d<\/p>\n
My heart slammed against my ribs.<\/p>\n
\u201cYes.\u201d<\/p>\n
She typed again.<\/p>\n
\u201cShe isn\u2019t admitted today.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cWas she here recently?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cI can\u2019t give you patient information.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cI\u2019m her\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n
I almost said friend.<\/p>\n
Then sister.<\/p>\n
Then family.<\/p>\n
None of them were true.<\/p>\n
I was the first wife\u2019s wife.<\/p>\n
I walked away.<\/p>\n
I found a coffee shop inside the hospital and sat in the corner.<\/p>\n
I ordered nothing.<\/p>\n
For nearly forty minutes, I watched the elevators.<\/p>\n
Then a man in blue scrubs came through the doors.<\/p>\n
He stopped when he saw me.<\/p>\n
I didn\u2019t recognize him.<\/p>\n
He recognized me.<\/p>\n
His face changed.<\/p>\n
He walked over slowly.<\/p>\n
\u201cJill?\u201d<\/p>\n
I stood.<\/p>\n
\u201cDo I know you?\u201d<\/p>\n
He glanced around.<\/p>\n
\u201cI\u2019m David.\u201d<\/p>\n
Nothing.<\/p>\n
\u201cDavid Carter. Jeremy\u2019s crew.\u201d<\/p>\n
My stomach tightened.<\/p>\n
\u201cYou work with Jeremy?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cSometimes.\u201d<\/p>\n
He sat across from me without asking.<\/p>\n
\u201cYou shouldn\u2019t be here.\u201d<\/p>\n
That sentence frightened me more than anything else that day.<\/p>\n
\u201cWhy?\u201d<\/p>\n
He rubbed both hands over his face.<\/p>\n
\u201cI thought you knew.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cKnew what?\u201d<\/p>\n
He stared at the table.<\/p>\n
Then he said quietly,<\/p>\n
\u201cAbout Lacey.\u201d<\/p>\n
I felt my throat close.<\/p>\n
\u201cWhat about her?\u201d<\/p>\n
David looked up.<\/p>\n
\u201cShe has cancer.\u201d<\/p>\n
The room seemed to go silent.<\/p>\n
I couldn\u2019t hear the coffee machines anymore.<\/p>\n
I couldn\u2019t hear the people talking.<\/p>\n
I could only hear those two words.<\/p>\n
\u201cShe has cancer?\u201d<\/p>\n
He nodded.<\/p>\n
\u201cStage four.\u201d<\/p>\n
I gripped the edge of the table.<\/p>\n
\u201cHow long?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cI don\u2019t know.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cJeremy knows?\u201d<\/p>\n
David looked at me like the question was ridiculous.<\/p>\n
\u201cJill\u2026 Jeremy has been driving here every Tuesday for almost three years.\u201d<\/p>\n
I closed my eyes.<\/p>\n
Three years.<\/p>\n
The parking stub.<\/p>\n
The tired face.<\/p>\n
The Tuesday silence.<\/p>\n
The extra long hugs.<\/p>\n
I opened my eyes.<\/p>\n
\u201cWhy didn\u2019t he tell me?\u201d<\/p>\n
David didn\u2019t answer.<\/p>\n
\u201cWhy did he marry her?\u201d<\/p>\n
He looked at me.<\/p>\n
\u201cI don\u2019t know if I should be telling you this.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cYou already started.\u201d<\/p>\n
He looked toward the hospital doors.<\/p>\n
\u201cLacey didn\u2019t want to die alone.\u201d<\/p>\n
I stared at him.<\/p>\n
\u201cWhat does that have to do with Jeremy?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cEverything.\u201d<\/p>\n
He lowered his voice.<\/p>\n
\u201cShe wanted one thing before she died.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cWhat?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cTo be his wife.\u201d<\/p>\n
My heart twisted.<\/p>\n
\u201cWhy?\u201d<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
PART 3 \u201cCould there be two?\u201d \u201cThere could,\u201d she said carefully. \u201cBut not with the same Social Security information on the filing.\u201d I stared at her. \u201cYou checked?\u201d \u201cI did.\u201d She lowered her voice. \u201cI knew something wasn\u2019t right when you came back yesterday.\u201d I looked down at the certificate again. The date was three…<\/p>\n